Those Ferocious Critics

I suppose the greatest problem a writer in the theater has is to face “those ferocious critics.” My problem is even greater. I write my own critics’ reviews as I’m writing my play. I place Walter Kerr just behind my right shoulder holding in his hand a big stick—with rusty nails. If I get verbose or careless or stretch for jokes, Mr. Kerr lets me have it right across the knuckles.